Late Night TV

I was up late a couple of nights ago and I was wound tighter than a watch couldn’t go to sleep right away. I found myself surfing through my satellite programing with lightening speed. Almost every channel in the little blue box read Paid Programing. Everyone knows the kind of stuff you find on television at around 2:00 A.M., when you are the only one in the house who is awake.

All the cooking shows with newfangled, new Wave technology, the kind of gadgets that appear to be a deal, only because you would be the only one on the block with one. It is also very astounding to me at how basic my form of cooking at the present time is. I learned how to make juice out of the stuff you usually throw out, like the top parts of celery, the apple core, and the seeds of the citrus fruit, and even the banana peel has nutrients . . . ha ha that is what is missing in my diet. I never found out if these items are good carbs or bad carbs. Somehow I am not sure it really matters, because the woman who was helping in this endeavor, was a larger woman in size than I am. I thought I was a really good sized woman, apparently I am doing it all wrong.

Now maybe it is just me but, a Chimp in the zoo knows not to eat the banana peel, but this guy insisted you can put it in your juice. The other thing I thought while watching this is, I just cannot do a juice diet there isn’t any way, all that time I would be spending in the bathroom. Who really has time like that?? These people will convince you how you really need this product and how healthy it will make you. They don’t tell you that you will be totally incapacitated upon using the Juicer which I will not name. Then there are the same people on another channel selling some kind of sandwich machine and at the same time on another channel the woman of a large frame was on still another channel selling some kind of rotisserie machine. My thoughts at this time were not nice to say the least. This woman really gets around, and no wonder she is as big as she is if she eats all the stuff she is cooking.

Just think about this for a split second, she helps us cook the rotisserie turkey, makes the stuffing in the wonder pot, has her vegetables in the bamboo steamer and makes her surprise baked rolls with butter & herb cream cheese centers made in the sandwich machine. Oh and let us not forget the Nutrition juice made from all the leftover scraps from making all this. Why you don’t even waste a thing, what a deal! A Full course dinner in four shows and to make it complete, they all air at the same time simultaneously.

This is just the tip of the Iceberg, and I am switching back and forth between the channels just to watch all of this. And to then go on a kitchen raid because all of the sudden I am hungry. I guess that the promise to myself about watching the snacking, went right out the window, all because I watched all this food being made with lightening speed.

Then I was zipping through the channels once again, and I then focused on the “ wonder diet” pills, powders, liquids, and other assorted diet miracles. I am just amazed at how little I knew about fat in the diet and that I have these problems that can occur as we get older. I always thought if you wanted to loose the weight you just don’t eat, or decrease the amount of food you consume, and increase your exercise and become more active. Silly me, I am so naive……..Ha Ha

Guess that proves what I know or don’t know. I never dreamed I could take this liquid at night and it would in a very small amount of time will make me skinny. I just cannot imagine going on one of those spots taking a pair of my really big pants and getting paid to promote the product. And the truth of the matter the pants they show, came from a good will, or salvation army. The skinny people showing them, have always been skinny. They can do wonders with photography these days. With the help of computers, you can become instantly fat by using copy, cut, paste, & smooth. So it must really be embarrassing for these (so-called fatties) to have family members know they lie for a living

What is it with this American society with being skinny? Like I am not a beautiful, productive, part of society. Unless I am an anorexic, bolemic, diet pill popping, shake making, salad eating, vegetarian, exercising, 48 yr old, with a taebo tape and trainer. Using one of many diet systems to fit in my size 2 jeans that I never got to wear when I was a teenager. Boy that was a mouthful of garbage, but that is how it makes me feel.

You never really believe these ads, but that is what they are designed to do, make you and I believe that we are the outcasts in society, and they are the ones with the answers to a newer version of us. All you have to believe is that it is worth keeping your checkbook open, and your credit card maxed out to be one of the truly beautiful people. Well I say phooey, and double phooey as I eat my daily Vienna cream cookie and cup of coffee with sugar. That’s right sugar, real white sugar in my coffee!!!

As the famous cartoon character Popeye used to say “I am what I ams, and that is all that I ams” So, guess what people?? I am slightly heavy for my height and frame but I am quite healthy, not over indulgent, and come from pretty good genetic, I have fought it all my life and could teach you all a few things about the myths. And the fact is I will probably outlive my productiveness any way, most of the people on both sides of my family were still working, and being productive up into their 80’s. So, the odds are stacked in my favor and I am going to enjoy my cookie and dunk it in my fully caffeinated, sugary coffee and enjoy one of the simplest pleasures in my life.

Now this is not necessarily about me, so let us move on to even more annoying type television, that clogs up my channels of satellite viewing up into the wee hours of the night.

The one that really gets me going the really big, big lie that is a charlatan all it’s own. The singles lines, the dating lines, the Hot Girls waiting telephone meeting place. Ha! Ha! Ha!

I have one major question as I watch some of these ads, when exactly, did talking on the phone become dating??? I have been out of circulation for quite some time but I never heard of this terminology. Honestly have all you single people reduced yourselves to this? I heard the one girl say “ I can’t talk to you “ (as she looked right at the camera and held the phone to her ear) “ I am on a date” (meaning the guy she was on the phone with). Now people, when? when? Since when is talking on the phone with a guy dating????? Then this same woman said into the phone “I feel so connected to you”. HUMMM what happened to meeting someone at the mall, at the post office, at the grocery store, at a church social, or at your work?

Now I am truly sorry for these people who use this as an alternative to really meeting someone in a place or through a friend. I just don’t get it, are you really wanting to be so reclusive, or are you really that naive? How can you feel connected to anyone on the phone? I just don’t get it. And anyway why are you doing this? you miss out on the heart pounding excitement of meeting this person face to face over dinner, or take in a movie, or going bowling, or going to the ball game with friends that are mutual. How can you make it sound good? Like it is a good thing to have no contact and have no face to go along with the voice?? This can’t be good. It makes me wonder what kind of message are we as a society sending the young men coming into their own. That it is perfectly fine, for this behavior, that you just need to have a credit card, and money in your check book to have some kind of relationship with someone solely on the phone.

And then my mind goes one step further, oh my goodness, this guy at work by the water cooler. Talking with his co-workers, “ I met this girl last night she is so cool and sexy, she and I can talk about anything, man she is hot.” All the others want to know who she is, so he tells them her first name only, because that is all he got from her. Then the cold hard fact sinks in he could be standing next to her in the elevator, on the bus, or at the doctors office because he has never actually met her, nor does he have a face to put with the sexy voice. How do you know she is sexy?? She might be looking like your aunt Martha, with a wart on her chin, older than dirt, bent fingers from arthritis, hair in curlers, in her fuzz pink robe and goofy slippers, with a cigarette hanging out of her mouth. Oh, by the way your mother knew aunt Martha got a 900 number to make extra money and was sworn to secrecy………OOOPS!

That is just one that I found myself looking at, the other one is a channel who claims to have “The Hot Girls” they are all 18ish and almost naked. Call them now, 1-900-******* ”come and talk to me” so sexy in barely nothing, boobs hanging high due to implants, I don’t have a stretch marks any where on my body. Taking woman hood to the lowest low, in that phoney Marilyn Monroe kind of voice, all winded. They know who they are, I am winded cause I smoke, and am slightly on the heavy side. What is their excuse?? Oh and let me tell you something else, the fact is that if they were as Hot as they think they are they wouldn’t have to be on my TV at 3:30 AM begging you to call them, so they would have something to do.

What???? you think I am jealous . Not a chance, Even when I was a skinnier version of me I would never have lowered my standards to be caught out in public, let alone on a camera in some of the skimpy things these girls had on. When and where I come from you only wore that kind of thing if you were trying to be sexy on purpose for your mate, husband , or opposite sex partner. And usually if it was done right Sex would occur, someone would be getting some. Now understand this, I wasn’t the most popular girl in school, I was miss invisible and I never had to beg for people to call me. I always had people calling me, at all hours of the day and night when I was single and out on my own. It is like a right of passage, and I wasn’t the prettiest, the skinniest, but personality has everything to do with it. I guess that is all for now I am really tired of watching my satellite television, I think I will turn on my soft music when I can’t sleep from now on.